She may not know how to swim but she sure knows how to dress for it. The latest bikini, caftan, hat, designer shades and a drink in hand. She worked hard for this goddammit! You may not see a drop of water on her but she will sunbathe, drink and flaunt err I mean sleep by the pool all day while occasionally checking on her kids.
The book worm/fish
She will park herself with a book or two while the hubby or excellent swimmer kids jump in the pool. She might as well read indoors but what would be the fun in that? She will not move and will have her nose in the book for a couple of hours ignoring her brood and all mankind. She’s on stand by if needed but till then bliss!
The shade chaser
Her entire being is focused on the perfect spot. She’ll be up bright and early to get the best pool chairs. You’ll catch her moving the wares as the sun moves. To the east in the morning and the west by the evening. She’s alert to rookies who haven’t grabbed a chair or folks who were careless not to hold their spot with a bag or a book. She will pounce on it and seize it like a hawk and move her paraphernalia in a jiffy till the next migration in a few minutes.
The rule follower
On the dot every hour or so. She will lather the kids with copious amounts of sunblock and have them hydrate and take bathroom breaks every 15 minutes. No running by the pool, rinse before you enter, rinse after you get out, everything to a tee.
The hands-on swim coach
It’s not a vacation, it’s your life thinks this mom every second all day long and also at the pool. Time is precious and it’s a shame her 11-month-old kid can’t do a proper backstroke yet. She will ask them to get on with the drills 53 …. 54 … She won’t rest and won’t let her kid rest till they’re some version of Phelps.
Not very social. Her face is this time not so much in a book but behind a screen. The phone screen. She will take pictures in every pose with every filter and will have her kids strike the perfect pose by the blue pool with the light hitting their faces just so. It takes time and she will make the time even if it means that’s all they do at the pool. She has to post on one or all of her social media accounts where she catalogs her kids’ and her life or maybe she’s making sure like every one of us in the world – that they know – so she knows – that its a good life they’re living. Right?
The I don’t give a *damn* mom
Belly out, flabby arms, skinny butt? No problem. She owns it like a Goddess and doesn’t give a rats ass what you think. She’s given birth and there ain’t nothing to hide. She will carry herself with dignity and confidence and sprawls out on the pool chair like an octopus if she damn well pleases. Her inner Rhett Butler is shining strong because she’s happy and frankly darling she doesn’t give a damn!
Which one am I? Frankly all of them in different degrees. Which one are you?